60 Quotes by Mike Judge

I don't return anybody's calls unless it's going to mean extra money for me. And I've completely cut off all relationships with any friends that I had before the show. And I've copped an attitude.

I probably drive casting people crazy because I'm not thinking about actors so much as real people.

They don't make you pay for the humor. It's up and down, but they're trying to give you as many laughs as possible in 2 minutes. They are the most honest comedians ever.

I don't think any movie I would do would be too serious or serious at all.

Yeah, sometimes it gets a little sappy for me, but I'm tired of hearing about dysfunctional families in sitcoms. That's been done to death, and that's probably what everybody expected from me. But that's not what I wanted to do.

I'm fine watching stuff on tape, to me casting is the most painful part of the whole process, it's like going on a horribly awkward date every five minutes for eight hours, and people come in and they'll be someone good but they're not right, and you want to tell them they're good, but it sounds like BS, and they're looking at your face to see how they did, what adjustments they need, and it's just so emotionally draining, and it goes on and on.

I often feel that my life, much like my shows, will end on a cliffhanger.

You ought to try being cruel to some people.

It's amazing what we can get away with and what we can't. But it's not for me to decide.