911 Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

There is no horizon in Toledo. There are too many trees.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

One thing talk can't accomplish is communication. This is because everybody's talking too much to pay attention to what anyone is saying

Lack of romance is my real objection to writing on a computer.

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

The Constitution is an equally forthright piece of work and quite succinct ... giving the complete operating instructions for a nation of 250 million people. The manual for a Toyota Camry, which only seats five, is four times as long.

Writing this book required an enormous amount of help from friends. To them goes the credit. I'll take the money.

If it were not for government regulation of big corporations, executives at companies like Enron, WorldCom, Tyco, they could have cheated investors out of millions.

There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.