138 Quotes by Paula Poundstone

Thomas E has already told me that he had to write a tweet for English and that his teacher liked his rough draft. Alley’s.

Deep-rooted happiness may require a sense of purpose. If I don’t feel that I am in some small way contributing to the greater good, holding on to happiness is like carrying water in my hands.

I don’t need a holiday or a feast to feel grateful for my children, the sun, the moon, the roof over my head, music, and laughter, but I like to take this time to take the path of thanks less traveled.

Remember when you were considered an environmentalist when you didn’t throw junk out the car window? I sure do miss that simpler, happier time.

My parents got carried away with the letter P when they were naming the kids in our family. There’s me, Paula, my sisters Peggy and Patty, and my brother Pjimmy, spelled with a silent P.

If only someone would do for cows what Bambi did for deer. Cows have been in films, but they haven’t starred. I’m still willing to eat a species that is only a supporting player.

I fall short of her standards. She made me buy cat food that hasn’t been tested on animals. My cats took one bite of it, spit it out, and yelled, “Did no one test this?

Can you remember when you didn’t want to sleep? Isn’t it inconceivable? I guess the definition of adulthood is that you want to sleep.

I don’t have a bank account because I don’t know my mother’s maiden name.