458 Quotes by Penn Jillette

There never was a God. 'God is dead' is a halfway measure I won't go with.

This I believe: I believe there is no God.

I've been fired from a situational comedy with a script they wrote specifically for me because of my voice.

I've never had a drink of alcohol or any drug in my life.

TV networks are dying. The death throes of religion give us jihads. The death throes of television give us reality shows.

When someone is trying to interpret something for you, they always have an agenda.

So many people say, ‘You know, your taxes aren’t taken by force,’ and that’s foolish. If you don’t pay your taxes and you don’t answer the warrant and you don’t go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up.

Teller and I worked Renaissance Festivals and street performing - actually more real, no kidding around, Philadelphia street performing than we did Renaissance Festivals.

When you tell other people to do stuff they don't know how to do, they tend to freak out.