103 Quotes by Ralphie May

I see the absurdity in things, and I think it's my job to point it out.

I want to raise awareness about evils perpetuated on American citizens by other American citizens.

I'm not crooked, and I want to help people.

I'm not PC all the time in my phrasing, because that meets a wall; people won't hear it.

I'm dirty, I'm irreverent - but I'm still a very topical comedian.

I go out and I meet people after the show, I take every picture that they ask for, I sign every autograph that they want. You know, there's merchandise for sale, but people don't have to buy anything. I'll sign their tickets, I'll sign whatever they want me to, I'll get a picture with them and I'll stay there with them as long as they want.

I'm blue collar, which means white trash with a job. But it also means people who take pride in what they do.

Vegas needs a really funny, dirty, late-night show, and I'll tell it like it is, I promise you that. And you gotta love the audience I bring in.

I don't just live in a bubble in Los Angeles. I'm on the road all the time. I say hello to people everywhere. That way, you get to see what despair is around the holidays. People are making terrible choices: Do I have heat in the winter or food on the table? Decisions between filling the gas tank or buying a gift for a kid.