59 Quotes by S. J. Perelman

We old roosters must be cautious. Don’t try to outwit your arteries.

All right, so call me Miss Cliche of 1960, but the thing about the married ones that always spooks me is how sweet and attentive they are at first, when they’re on the prowl.

In my more pompous moments I like to think of myself as a writer rather than a humorist, but I suppose that’s merely the vanity of advancing age.

I cannot recall a more engaging passage in fiction, and I’ve been trying for almost eighteen seconds.

If, at the close of business each evening, I myself can understand what I’ve written, I feel the day hasn’t been totally wasted.