564 Quotes by Scott Adams

Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?

Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

When you hire that first person, then you're a boss. You've got performance reviews. You've got complaints about not making enough money. You've got people who are just going to sell your story to the tabloids.

We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.

Management is nature's way of removing idiots from the productive flow.

Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.

Frankly, I’m suspicious of anyone who has a strong opinion on a complicated issue.

I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.

As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.