105 Quotes by Will Cuppy

Male penguins are unfaithful up to an advanced age, a phenomenon sometimes attributed to the sea air.

Other countries may boast of this and that, but nobody can touch the United States for poisonous snakes. We have about twenty species, most of them deadly, and Europe has only five or six, none of them much good. We have fifteen kinds of Rattlesnakes alone and nobody else has even one. [ There is a species in Central and South America, but it probably came from the United States ].

[Footnote:] Much still remains to be learned about his sex life because the Hummingbird is quicker than the eye.

Young normal tigers do not eat people. If eaten by a tiger you may rest assured he was abnormal.

Frogs will eat red-flannel worms fed to them by biologists; this proves a great deal about both parties concerned.

The Earthworm plows the whole world with his tunnels, drains and aerates the earth… If you ever buy any land, be sure it has plenty of Earthworms toiling and moiling all day so that you can sit down and relax.

Galvani was mistaken about the amount of electricity in frogs, but he had some good ideas, too, for the galvanometer is named in his honor, and you don't have galvanometers named after you merely for making a mistake about a frog.

The sloth lives his life upside down. He is perfectly comfortable that way. If the blood rushes to his head, nothing happens because there is nothing to work on.

Aristotle taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons.