1,171 Quotes by Will Rogers

The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.

You politicians have got to look further ahead; you always got a Putter in your hands, when you ought to have a Driver.

The way to make money in the stock market is to buy a stock. Then, when it goes up, sell it. If it's not going to go up, don't buy it!

The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back

A Realtor is an old fashioned Real Estate man with a neck tie. A Real Estate man sold you what you wanted, a Realtor sells you what you don't need. A Real Estate man showed you what you could raise on the land, a Realtor tells you what you can build on it.

Gentlemen, you have just been listening to that Chinese sage, On Too long

If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

Andrew Jackson was the first one to think up the idea to promise everybody that if they will vote for you, you will give them an office when you get it, and the more times they vote for you, the bigger the office.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.