1,171 Quotes by Will Rogers

The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.

The trip across Arizona is just one oasis after another. You can just throw anything out and it will grow there, I like Arizona.

Cities are like gentlemen, they are born, not made. You are either a city, or you are not, size has nothing to do with it. I bet San Francisco was a city from the very first time it had a dozen settlers. New York is "Yokel", but San Francisco is "City at Heart".

When an Okie moves to California, he raises the IQ of both states

I don't know how a lot of these nations existed as long as they have till we could get some of our people around and show 'em how to be good and pure like us.

Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Candidates have been telling you that if elected they would 'pull you from this bog hole of financial misery.' Now is a good chance to get even with 'em, by electing 'em, just to prove what a liar they are.

In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You being there was certificate enough.

Banking and after-dinner speaking are two of the most nonessential industries we have in this country. I am ready to reform, if they are.