1,171 Quotes by Will Rogers

Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

A Republican moves slowly. They are what we call conservatives. A conservative is a man who has plenty of money and doesn't see any reason why he shouldn't always have plenty of money. A Democrat is a fellow who never had any, but doesn't see any reason why he shouldn't have some.

The Democrats and Republicans are equally corrupt -- it's only in the amount where the Republicans excel.

Well, another senator rose and said {as they always do} 'Does the gentleman yield?' They always say that - least they call each other 'gentleman' in there. But the tone they put on the word, it would sound more appropriate if they came right out and said 'Would the coyote from Maine yield?' 'cause that's about the way it sounds. Well, then, the other senator says 'I yield' (for if he don't the other guy'll keep on talking anyhow). So the coyote from Maine says 'I yield to...the polecat from Oregon!'

If you got a dollar, soak it away, put it in a savings bank, bury it, do anything but spend it. Spending when we didn't have it put us where we are today. Saving when we've got it will get us back to where we was before we went cuckoo.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

I belong to no organized political body. I am a Democrat.

An economist is a man that can tell you...what can happen under any given condition, and his guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's too.

The US is safest when Congress is in recess.