106 Quotes by Wilson Mizner

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.

I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.

To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

I have known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, but never had a thought.

God sends our relatives, but we can choose our friends.

Many a live wire would be a dead one except for his connections

A trip through a sewer in a glass-bottomed boat.