My two best friends are dead, which means they're great listeners now, but lousy as far as support goes.

Please don't' ask me how I feel about it. If I had to pick a word, I'd say homicidal.

I think my invisibility cloak just failed.

If the world ends tomorrow, understand that I regret saying no.

It's satisfying. It yields immediate results. Something is dirty. Then it's not.

Five years, my family thinks it's time I moved on. I'd like to move on with a non-asshole

Do you realize you're talking to yourself?Yes.It's good that you know the difference.

You're not dead.I'm not dead.Why? How?Dying wasn't on my list.

If you kill him, call me. I'm bound by doctor client privilege.Really?No, but the courts make exceptions for assholes.