No parents. You have Uncle Jesse, forever in overalls. Then there's Bo and Duke. What do they do? I never saw them working for food or gas money. You can only kill so many possum.

I thought "RV" stood for "Recreational Vehicle." No! It stands for "Ruins Vacations."

You could take Vicodin, step out of the house, onto a freeway, have a truck hit you, and you'd say "My Bad!".

Welcome to my garage! This is where I go to get away from the honey-do list.

I hit two trees and fell down a ditch. And that was just walking from the lodge.

That's why they're man's best friend. 'Cause guys want buddies that are dumber than they are. So do women, but they've already got men