With a philosophy education, one can infuriate his peers, intimidate his date, think of obscure, unreliable ways to make money, and never regret a thing.

If I were to envy any persons on this planet, it would be mountain hermits. You often hear old platitudes such as, 'Speak out. Be heard.' On the contrary, a breath of fresh air would be something like: 'Silence, think for at least 15 minutes, and then maybe speak out.

Absurdity is the ecstasy of intellectualism.

If ever it's necessary to ride the bandwagon, it's done with one leg swinging out and eyes scoping the fields.

Of course, in our train of thought, we would all like to think we're on the right track, or at least the same railroad company as the right track.

I treat my thoughts like an old person treats their valuables: I cannot for the life of me proceed to throwing them out.

Whenever I think of something but can't think of what it was I was thinking of, I can't stop thinking until I think I'm thinking of it again. I think I think too much.

To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it.

Some of the most polished ideas are discovered through healthy, honest debate, so if you don't argue with yourself every once in a while, other people will gladly point out if, in any sense, you missed a spot.