In fact, when you get right down to it, almost every explanation Man came up with for anything until about 1926 was stupid.

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

The best time to go to Disney World, if you want to avoid huge crowds, is 1962.

Epcot Center also features pavilions built by various foreign nations, where you can experience an extremely realistic simulation of what life in these nations would be like if they consisted almost entirely of restaurants and souvenir stores.

Greyhound Bus Lines motto: "We Stop For Some Damn Thing Every 200 Yards."

Never trust anything you read in a travel article.

The population of earth has reached 7 billion people, every single one of whom send you irritating emails to join something called "LinkedIn."

Nobody is excused from the excellence trend. Babies are not excused. Starting right after they get out of the womb, modern babies are exposed to instructional flashcards designed to make them the best babies they can possibly be, so they can get into today's competitive preschools. Your eighties baby sees so many flashcards that he never gets an unobstructed view of his parents' faces. As an adult, he'll carry around a little wallet card that says "7x9=63," because it will remind him of mother.

While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Internet are exchanging, freely and openly, the most uninhibited, intimate and, yes, shocking details about our "CONFIG.SYS" settings.