The lazy man claims he is too heavy for light work and too light for heavy work.

Egotist: 1. A person who is his own best friend. 2. An I specialist. 3. A man whose opinions all change, except the one he has of himself.

A home in the country is what a city man hopes to buy and a farmer hopes to sell.

The man who has a girl in every port is not a sailor but a wholesaler.

Age brings wisdom to some men, and to others chess.

Some men take good care of a car; others treat it like one of the family.

Only one man has the right to boast, and that's the man who never does.

The reason why men who mind their own business succeed is that they have so little competition.

A man picks a wife about the same way an apple picks a farmer.