Seriously, why was it tradition to stand when the bride came in? It blocked her from seeing her groom, who was the only reason she was there in the first place.

Babe, I hate to break it to you, but you're one messed up mess.""I know!" I exclaimed before breaking off into a fit of laughter. "I ought to be admitted or put on some serious medication or something.

...and yes that was meant to be interpreted in a sarcastic bubblegum tone complete with clapping and jazz hands.

I invited Onyx to be my plus one. Of course she was all in when I added that Grandma A had a massive swimming pool and was within a short driving distance to a two-story bookstore.