28 Quotes by Milton Berle about Christmas
- Author Milton Berle
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I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.
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- Author Milton Berle
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They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
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- Author Milton Berle
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
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- Author Milton Berle
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I bought a Christmas tree for twenty dollars. When I came home the next day, my wife was wearing it in her hair.
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- Author Milton Berle
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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- Author Milton Berle
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War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
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- Author Milton Berle
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There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.
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- Author Milton Berle
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
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- Author Milton Berle
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I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.
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