But then all I could see was him seeing me. I got nervous. Was he looking at my nose? Did it look giant? Did I have food on my face? I couldn't breathe. I panicked. Because worse than the big nose and possible gook on face was that he could tell I cared. My heart naked and vulnerable.

They're on a retreat!" I yelled out of nowhere, even though I swore I wouldn't say anything. Ever! And now I'm worried I sound insane AND he'll tell someone. Because I'm so confused about being honest!

My excitement about Sunday is unbridled. My heart constantly pounding. I dyed my hair pink. Then saw Leo’s face. Dyed it back. Borrowed Sadie’s lime-green-and-pink dress with orange trim. I feel a need to be bright and colorful and noticeable. Yet classy.

They went to loft downtown. V. cool, artsy, mostly artists, kind of boho wild. There was even a naked guy walking around. I asked why. She didn't know but probably he just needed attention disguised as being artsy.