If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.

Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.

Sex is the last refuge of the miserable.

The trouble with children is that they're not returnable.

An autobiography is an obituary in serial form with the last installment missing.

However low a man sinks he never reaches the level of the police.

Life was a funny thing that occurred on the way to the grave