316 Quotes About Funny-and-random

There is no logic in logics except an illogical logic.

He wanted to open her up like a new WalMart.

I'm Magnus Bane." he went on in a soothing tone, stretching out his ringed hands. Blue sparks had begun to dance between them like bioluminescence dancing water. "I'm the warlock who's here to cure you. Didn't they tell you I was comming?""I know who you are, but..." Maia looked dazed. "You look so... so... shiny.

Now there's a girl I don't want to mess with' — or at least, that's what I would think if I had a chronic fear of freakishly nice people.

I wish kids at school would quit calling me a porno dork-face, though. There wasn't any sex involved! I got knocked out, I panicked and called the cops. Okay, somewhere along the line everybody's clothes fell off, but that's not exactly a federal crime. Is it? I hope you don't work for the FBI. (You don't, do you?)- Email Excerpt (Page: 21) From: Douglas Bracken To: Dr. Rita I. MiltonSent: Friday, November 08 - 5:05 PMSubject: Pressing Concerns

I think I'm supposed to "take a sad song and make it better," but that's beyond my musical ability

If anybody tells says you have to follow his or her #religion or you're going to hell, tell that silly ass to go to hell. Be well.

May you be wise. Stop telling lies. Also, don't eat flies.

Leo took out a pen and autographed the arm of one of the nymphs. “Narcissus is a loser! He’s so weak, he can’t bench-press a Kleenex. He’s so lame, when you look up lame on Wikipedia, it’s got a picture of Narcissus—only the picture’s so ugly, no one ever checks it out.