5,226 Quotes About Humour

Life is a process during which one initially gets less and less dependent, independent, and then more and more dependent.

How did you . . . pass the time?’ Sunday asked. ‘You couldn’t just ching out of it, could you?’‘We had a different form of chinging,’ Eunice said. ‘An earlier type of virtual-reality technology, much more robust and completely unaffected by time lag. You may have heard of it. We called it “reading”.

My ghosts won't associate with your ghosts - Matthias Helvar

But cocks aren’t supposed to lay eggs...” Sahil said, trying to untangle himself. “...they’re supposed to fertilise them.

Sometimes the walk to the doctors is a better cure than the medicine you receive

It was like being leaned on by a very heavy, warm brick. A sexy brick.

Do you know what I think about crying? I think some people have to learn to do it. But once you learn, once you know how to really cry, there's nothing quite like it. I feel sorry for those who don't know the trick. It's like whistling or singing.

Watsons - It’s so exciting writing this one I got carried away with it.

The average adult has had sex innumerable times more than they have formed an opinion of their own.