When Peter and Kira had their first child, Isak, Kira said to him, "This is what we are now. Everything else comes after this. First and foremost, we are parents!" Peter already knew that, of course. All parents know. It's not a voluntary process, it's an emotional assault; you become someone else's property the first time you hear your child cry. You belong to that little person now. Before everything else. So when something happens to your child, it never stops being your fault.
-Fredrik Backman
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