177 Quotes by Eric Idle

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn't make sense, and that it doesn't make much difference anyway.

So, what have I learned over my long and weird life?Well, first, that there are two kinds of people, and I don’t much care for either of them. Second, when faced with a difficult choice, either way is often best. Third, always leave a party when people begin to play the bongos.

Mere lack of evidence, of course, is no reason to denounce a theory. Look at intelligent design. The fact that it is bollocks hasn’t stopped a good many people from believing in it. Darwinism itself is only supported by tons of evidence, which is a clear indication that Darwin didn’t write his books himself.

Sind sie vorbestraft? Du lieber Himmel ich wußte gar nicht, dass das immer noch nötig ist." Britischer Witz über die Einreise nach Australien

The room was rococo. I had a strong sense of gilt.

Once you’re in the circus you’re all in the circus, and of course it turns out that they are real people too.

Always look on the bright side of life.

Laughter is the only sane response to pathological lying.

I have British teeth. They are like British politics: they go in all directions at once.