565 Quotes by Groucho Marx

If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.

Time wounds all heels.

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.

Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!

A man is only as old as the woman he feels.

Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.