79 Quotes by J.S. Mason

which was so easy a staples button could do it

When the defense attorney finished her opening statement, which included a lot of body movement due to the fact that the bar exam that she passed only included limbo references

tomatosauceruruses (the first Italian dinosaurs)

so the bartender knew he would be paid handsomely. Not beautifully, but handsomely as there is a subtle distinction and one all pretty boys need to hear.

wondering if Hercules was available, pondering the twelve labors of Hercules assuming that Hercules was a mythical Greek obstetrician

An octopus, who holds the record for defense in a football game – ten tackles

Glancing around for his friends eenie, meenie, miney, and mo, they were nowhere to be found and he was left stranded with this lane picking dilemma, so he grimaced and picked the first lane offered.

new performance ongoing where pages of a dictionary are ripped out and thrown on the stage floor, it’s a play on words with the title of the show being ‘Pun’.

It all began when Santa’s helpers demanded Universal Elf Care.