37 Quotes by Jack Paar

It was plain to see the Hollywood undertakers take care of everything. If you die you don't have to lift a finger.

We were ensconced as guests of the exclusive Beverly Hilton Hotel, an edifice so swank that the fire ax in the hall outside our suite said: "In case of fire-break crystal."

Then there was the time in Hollywood when I sat down in a breakaway chair and it collapsed on me. I was nearly knocked out and might have been even more seriously hurt but my fall was broken by the smog.

... Variety and the Hollywood Reporter, two publications read more faithfully in Hollywood than the Koran is in Mecca.

She should get a divorce and settle down.

It's almost impossible to dislike me, because I do nothing.

Disneyland is such a big thing to Californians, I discovered that when you cross the border you have to raise your right hand and take an oath that you believe in Walt Disney.

The only non-believer I encountered was Oscar Levant who wouldn't visit Disneyland because he said he had his own hallucinations.

In an interview Errol Flynn said that his hobby was acting but he doesn't have time for it.