9 Quotes by James Finn Garner

The wolf said, "You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone." Red Riding Hood said, "I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid, worldview. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way.

The emperor is naked!"The parade stopped. The emperor paused. A hush fell over the crowd, until one quick-thinking peasant shouted:"No, he isn't. The emperor is merely endorsing a clothing-optional lifestyle!

He burst into the house and ate Grandma, an entirely valid course of action for a carnivore such as himself.

While the archetype of the tinker is generally the whipping person in classical bedtimes stories, this particular individual was a tinker by trade and just happened to be economically disadvantaged.

The Emperor is merely endorsing a clothing-optional lifestyle!

Alas, if worth be based on beauty, Snow White has surpassed you, cutie.

There was a little girl who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very very good, But when she was bad, they upped her meds.

Old King Cole was a merrie old soul, A merrie old soul was he. He called for his pipe and called for his bowl And toked away, mon, for his irie.

Rapunzel rode to the city and rented a room in a building that had real stairs. She later established the non-profit Foundation for the Free Proliferation of Music and cut off her hair for a fund-raising auction. She sang for free in coffee houses and art galleries for the rest of her days, always refusing to exploit for money other people’s desire to hear her sing.