438 Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.

You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.

You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

If you break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.

You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.

You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.

If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married.

If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.