330 Quotes by W. C. Fields

Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.

I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

It is funnier to bend things than to break them.

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.

Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

Marriage is better than leprosy only because it's easier to get rid of.