As with most of life's problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation.

Actually, I was the very lowest ranked member of the crew. I would only be “in command” if I were the only remaining person.”What do you know? I’m in command

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I'll have to risk it.

WATNEY: Look! A pair of boobs! -> (.Y.).

I'm calling it the Watney Triangle because after what I've been through, shit on Mars should be named after me.

I gasped. "Wait a minute! Am I a guinea pig? I'm a guinea pig!""No, it's not like that," she said.I stared at her.She stared at me.I stared at her."Okay, it's exactly like that," she said.

Log Entry: SOL 118My conversation with NASA about the Water Reclaimer was boring and riddled with technical details. So I'll paraphrase for you:Me: "This is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and check the internal tubing?"NASA: (After about 5 hours of deliberation) "No. You'll fuck it up and die."So I took it apart.

I should be more focused on the "first contact with intelligent aliens" thing or the "save all of humanity" thing, but gosh darn it, I can spend a moment to be happy about being right when everyone said I was wrong.

Several families had obnoxious kids bouncing off the walls. In this case, "bouncing off the walls" is not just a figure of speech. The overstimulated kids were literally bouncing off the walls. Lunar gravity is the worst thing to ever happen to parents.