1,680 Quotes About Comedy

People keep making excuses, that’s why everthing happens for a reason.

Philadelphia is just the tip of the Pittsburgh.

If we get a 3D printer at the office, the first thing I’m printing with it is a new 3D printer just for me!

Comedians love people to point and laugh at them, even if they are not funny, naturists don't, no matter how funny they are.

Black graffiti on a black helicopter.

Secret 7591.42.21. Avoiding weasel words in your intelligence analysis isn't easy when your intelligence analysis is about weasels.

Ever notice that phrenologists have funny-shaped heads?

I'd rather have less time than I think, than less think than I have time.

The real mystery isn't what's under the redaction mark, but what's above it.