1,680 Quotes About Comedy

What are you assholes looking at?" "Nothing," said Radar. "We're certainly not looking at your eyebrows.

Sleepwalking is the perfect exorcise for lazy people

To neglect ones own ability to laugh is the greatest form of Blasphemy, for to laugh is to pray.

In the real world, babysitting is a groovy way for young people to learn responsibility (and earn a little pocket money). In the Terrorverse, it's a plot device used to kill teenagers.

Meaning, yes -- I don't really exist except on the page or in the back of your brain. But if you think it's weird a fictional character's telling this story, you ain't seen what happened, yet.

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks!”-Totie Fields-

I decide to release myself the only way I can imagine: I pee my pants.

Anticipation tingled in my stomach: the kind of tingle that at first you don’t know if it’s a good tingle or a bad tingle – just a tingle.

I'm holding a super-expandable energy-powered towel. I've made friends with space hamsters. I think we've stretched believability rather far, don't you?