24,501 Quotes About Humor

Jealousy is not a result of love. It is a result of crossed relationship boundaries. Love and relationships should not be confused.

As the doctor treated the wound, Mazer said, " I don't care how much you eat, Ender, self-cannibalism won't get you out of this school.

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye," Ferbus said too loudly. "Then it's one-eyed fun.

Don't fucking quote me!

A crazy old lady, leading a band of teenagers against an angry supernatural Entity - who’da thought?

A las personas mayores de 40 años no deberían permitirles tener novias o novios. Deberían tener amigos, nada mas.

Schwester Marie–Claire hatte in ihrem Ethikunterricht stets behauptet, es käme gar nicht darauf an, dass die Menschen an den Teufel glaubten, denn es reiche schon aus, dass der Teufel gute Gründe hätte an die Menschen zu glauben, um sicherstellen zu können, dass das Böse in der Welt weiterhin über das Gute triumphierte.

The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy offers this definition ofthe word "Infinite".Infinite: Bigger than the biggest thing ever and then some.Much bigger than that in fact, really amazingly immense, atotally stunning size, "wow, that's big", time. Infinity is just sobig that by comparison, bigness itself looks really titchy.Gigantic multiplied by colossal multiplied by staggeringlyhuge is the sort of concept we're trying to get across here.

Agatha Christie n. A silent, putrid fart committed by someone in this very room, and only one person knows whodunnit.