5,226 Quotes About Humour

Jesus paid for our sins, so let's get our money's worth.

We stop at the door. I’m still smiling.‘Well, bye,’ Noah says.‘Don’t call us! We’ll call you!’ I say to Noah. And I shoot the airwith cowboy guns. Noah blinks.

When life gives you lemons ask it for sugar and water too. Otherwise your final product would be some acidic lemon juice!

Those that know, do not need explanations, and those that do not, would not understand any explanations.

One cannot help feeling that some alternative occupation—lettuce farming, say—would offer somewhat less of a risk of being put to death by installments. Why do you persist in it?”Goldeneyes Dactylos shrugged.“I’m good at it,” he said.

Once I tried to kill myself with a bungee cord. I kept almost dying.

Impartially, shrewdly, I considered suicide, though not in my worst moments. The bottle of pills. The note: 'No hard feelings, everyone, but I've thought about it and it's just not on, is it? It's nearly on, but not quite. No? Anyway, all the best, C.

Hundreds of hysterical persons must confuse these phenomena with messages from the beyond and take their glory to the bishop rather than the eye doctor.

Look!" Hawkeye said. Duke looked where Hawkeye was pointing. In one corner, kneeling on the dirt floor with his elbows on his cot, a Bible in front of him, his lips moving slowly, and oblivious to all about him, was Major Jonathan Hobson."Jesus," Hawkeye said."It don't look like Him," Duke said.