52 Quotes About Iowa

I have fought through all the elements to get to where I am now. I've become a shell of what I used to be, and now there's more nature in me than man. Ghosts have filled the hollows of my memory, leaving behind the raging wind in the plane where there once had been so much promise.

Try this." O'Grady smiled. "It's the only thing we drink. It'll warm your insides." "What is it?" Asked the ever cautious Waldo. "We call it the Forest Flaming Special. Go ahead-drink up." "Well, okay...." Waldo lifted the cup and nearly dropped it when saw his name printed clearly on the side. "We've been expecting you." Explained Fred, beginning to laugh.

They talk about big skies in the western United States, and they may indeed have them, but you have never seen such lofty clouds, such towering anvils, as in Iowa in July.

I come from Des Moines. Somebody had to.

I woke up finding the world I had known to be gone. Instead, the sky was glowing. I stood up. Nothing had happened to the child, I was as perfectly pregnant as before. The sky seemed to be full of glittering objects floating around, that on further inspection were glowing specs. There were no trees, no buffalo, just endless hills that seem to go on and on.

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You know, if they ever gave a Nobel Prize for avoiding work, every year some white guy in Iowa would get a million bucks and a trip to Sweden.

History is full of decapitations, and Iowa is no exception.

I once heard a tobacco-chewing hog farmer say that, in Iowa, folks like to spread out their children like dog shit on a dance floor.