Practicing security means continually turning toward the best version of yourself. Each belief about yourself that you choose to hold onto, in each moment, is a step toward or away from the person you want to be. As Canadian entrepreneur Lynn Robinson says, “Our beliefs about ourselves are all made up. So it’s a good idea to make up some good ones.

We propose a different metric for the success of a relationship. Relationships that make us the best versions of ourselves are successes.

Your partner is a person, and people can’t be stolen. If some new shiny tries to “steal” him, he has to consent to being stolen. Veto or no veto, if he wants to stay with you, he will. So.

There’s nothing wrong with asking your partner to take time to show you why you’re valued.

A willingness to question yourself, to challenge yourself, and to explore without fear the hidden parts of you are the best tools to gain that self-knowledge.

The agreements that work most consistently are those that are rooted in compassion, encourage mutual respect and empowerment, leave it to our partners’ judgment how to implement them, and have input from – and apply equally to – everyone affected by them. T.

When we make ourselves vulnerable to others, we do more than show them how we value their friendship. We show that we trust them and are willing to be seen by them. We choose to let them show us the best of themselves.

Things will go wrong. You and your partners will make mistakes. People will get hurt. To paraphrase Voltaire, we are all born of frailty and error. What happens afterward depends on how capable we are to forgive one another for our errors, handle the consequences with grace and dignity, and learn from our mistakes.

A sense of worth is critical to counteracting the scarcity model of love and life. If we do not believe in our worth, we become disempowered, unable to advocate for our needs. We do not see or embrace the love that is actually around us in our lives.

The most immediate is that if you tell your partner “It’s okay to ask for anything you want,” it better be true. If you’re not prepared to make it safe for your partner to open up to you, he won’t. Because he’ll feel he can’t.