Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.

I was introduced to a beautiful young lady as a man in his nineties. Early nineties, I insisted.

Love is a lot like a backache; It doesn’t show up on X-Rays, but you know it’s there.

A good martini, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman..or a bad woman. Depending on how much happiness you can stand.

Being a living legend is better than being a dead legend.

I takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk the trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

Tennis is a young man's game. Until you're twenty-five, you can play singles. From twenty-five to thirty-five, you should play doubles. I won't tell you exactly how old I am, but when I played, there were twenty-eight men on the court - just on my side of the net.

Tennis is a young man's game. Until you're twenty-five, you can play singles. From twenty-five to thirty-five, you should play doubles. I won't tell you exactly how old I am, but when I played, there were twenty-eight men on the court—just on my side of the net.