The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back." Mrs. Cohen answered "So did my arthritis!

A Jewish woman had 2 chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

I asked a Jewish man "Do you know where Michigan Avenue is?" He said "Yes", and walked away.

If your going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for in the morning, sleep late.

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o clock.

I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by four o'clock this afternoon.

A man goes to a psychiatrist "Nobody listen to me!" The doctor says "Next!

A man goes to a psychiatrist. The doctor says ""You're crazy"" The man says ""I want a second opinion!"" ""Okay, you're ugly too!

A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks "Doc, how do I stand?" The doctor says "That's what puzzles me!

Doctor says to a man "You're pregnant!" The man says "How does a man get pregnant?" The doctor says "The usual way, a little wine, a little dinner....