JL

Jay London

56quotes

Quotes by Jay London

I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.
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I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.
I was born nine months premature.
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I was born nine months premature.
You know what burns me? Matches.
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You know what burns me? Matches.
People read me but they don't subscribe.
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People read me but they don't subscribe.
I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.
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I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.
I saw a stationery store move.
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I saw a stationery store move.
A guy gave me a job at an information booth – no questions asked.
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A guy gave me a job at an information booth – no questions asked.
I don’t need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.
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I don’t need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.
I’m convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb – they diffused it.
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I’m convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb – they diffused it.
I went to a urologist – he told me I could go at any time.
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I went to a urologist – he told me I could go at any time.
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