I'm a real Luddite.

I think ‘growing up’ would mean that you are incredibly tolerant and easygoing, liked everything, curious about the world because you weren’t so egotistically driven.

When uncle Eddie does his impression of ‘Like a Virgin’ it’s like Madonna is coming out of his body!? Christ what an image.

Still, a really heavy period should cheer me up.

I am going to become a writer for Cosmo – you don’t have to make any sense at all. Or maybe I’ll be a bloke, they don’t have to make sense either.

The fly in her argument is that when she says, ‘they’ will feel like lemons, we don’t know who ‘they’ are. And ‘they’ might BE lemons.

Who knows what goes on in my mind? I will be the last to know. Even.

And the kittykats would have to erect scaffolding and a pulley to get him down. Mind you, I wouldn’t put that past them. Sometimes when they are behind the sofa supposedly purring, I think they are drilling.

JUST LET IT GO.

Honestly, what planet do these people live on? And why isn’t it farther away?