Either way, the anger will come out onto us because we are his safety net, and therefore his target. We are the ones who will never leave. We are the ones who can take the arrows because we love our sons when no one else will, and they know it. And we will always be there when they return, regardless of how volatile the wars have been. How blessed we are to be the mothers of sons.

She felt indispensable and made no apologies. She allowed herself to accept her importance and this is something many of us mothers refuse to do.

The only way you will alienate your daughter in the long term is by losing her respect, failing to lead, or failing to protect her. If you don’t provide for her needs, she will find someone else who will – and that’s when trouble starts. Don’t let that happen.

If you don’t give guidance to your daughter, she’ll come up with answers of her own – which means your authority will be replaced by someone else’s.

Humility, however, prevents bullying and being bullied. When your daughter recognizes that all humans have equal value and never esteems herself above another, she doesn’t worry about asserting her superiority or take seriously a bully’s taunts. She knows that our worth is not in what we do, what we have, or what we are capable of being, but in the fact that we are human.

People are valuable because they’re human, not because of what they do.

Be calm, patient, and frank. Tell her that women in magazines aren’t the best role models, that people who judge everyone on their looks probably have terrible self-esteem issues. Tell her that what matters is not how thin someone is, but what her character is. And tell her what is great about her, what you like about her, what you hope for her.

When you teach her always to think about other people, to put herself in their shoes, to know that everyone – her friends, neighbors, and sister and brother – is important, you’ll give her the gift of friendship and living to the fullest as a caring, social being. If you teach your daughter to be good rather than simply happy, she will become both. Teaching your daughter humility is a wonderful gift. And it can be taught only by example.

At the beginning of her life, she will feel your love. At the end of her life, you will be on her mind. And what happens in between is up to you. Love her extraordinarily. This is the heart of great fathering.

Love her extraordinarily. This is the heart of great fathering. Chapter.