3 Quotes by Tony James Slater

And then came the three-toed sloth. Stupid sloth. It was a crazy-looking beastie, all arms and bristling grey fur; its body was a blob, the kind of shape a six-year-old would draw for a pig, and its face was flattened like a racoon that had run full tilt into a brick wall. A triangular stub of a nose jutted out at an angle beneath a fringe that must have been difficult to see through. In fact, from side-on it looked disturbingly like John Lennon.

Please don't follow in my footsteps. I'm already knee-deep in them, and am sinking rapidly...

I must have been a very naughty boy in a previous life to end up with two left feet and the grace of a dead hippopotamus.