1,680 Quotes About Comedy

Mary the Canary lives in a cloud of perfume and colours. She's an auxiliary nurse by day and a country and western singer by night: bed pans and power ballass. She's so glamorous she makes Mrs Hart look plain. She is the other woman and I'm bring trained to hate her even though I've never met her.

waffle: (n.) breakfast of politicians.

So you spoke to Laurence Myer?”“Oh, no. I added him though. We’ve achieved virtual friendship.

She nodded and smiled, but I could feel that she was slightly disappointed in me. Like Ms Parker when I answer every question in English with ‘It’s a metaphor for desire.

Mediocrity is fine if you accept it.

If you're not creating, you're waiting.

I actually think women are generally very discreet about the whole thing (e.g. Gracie, who obviously bleeds rainbows). If guys bled out of their penises for a week of every month, you can bet we’d hear more about it.

I feel weird and not at all like myself, like Stefan Salvatore when he gets the taste for human blood after 150 years.

As it turns out, not being distracted by constant Snapchats from Steph means I’m actually getting lots of stuff done. I bet having a fight with her best mate is how Coco Chanel got started.