5,226 Quotes About Humour

I am not sleeping with you.""We could probably manage it, though. Without getting too involved.""No," she said."But why? I mean, if we're trusted friends? And it doesn't interfere with our responsibilities?""Did that line ever actually work for you?""I can't remember. But it probably did-it's brilliant.

You don't want him," she said to the pink-haired girl. "He has syphilis."The girls stared. "Syphilis?""Five percent of people in America have it," said Ty helpfully."I do not have syphilis," Mark said angrily. "There are no sexually transmitted diseases in Faerieland!""Sorry," Jules said. "You know how syphilis is. Attacks the brain.

Tom. Tom, look at me. Has Nora agreed to marry you?""No, but she will because she has to.

Tom, how many children do you think I have to have before I figure out you get them by having sex?""Of course there would be protection," he offered."Tons of it.

Maybe we could, um, go sit in the truck?" he said, but even as he said it, it sounded so dumb. And not exactly the way he wanted her to remember a marriage proposal.

If we had to earn our age by thinking for ourselves at least once a year, only a handful of people would reach adulthood.

They were Siamese twins, joined at the groin by a traitorous piece of meat.

Rockabye Baby, in the treetopDont you know a treetopis no safe place to rock?And who put you up there,and your cradle too?Baby,I think someone down herehas got it in for you!

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