I have something very important to say to you, but I can't tell you what it is. It's a very important thing, but I'll tell you another time.

It won't be whiskey, won't be methIt'll be your name on my last breathIf divorce or death ever do us partThe coroner will call it a broken heart

She pushed the car. But I was so distracted that i forgot to push the button on the timer, so we had to do the whole thing again. Which Lindsey found hilarious. "Ok" she said. "Are you ready NOW, or do we have to send you back to Button Pushing one-oh-one?" "Um, what's Button Pushing One-oh-one?" I was wearing a button down shirt that day. Lindsey reached out and poked one of the buttons into my chest. "There, that's how you push a button. Any questions?

I am afraid it is quite clear, Cecily, that neither of us is engaged to be married to any one.

That's because we were together for two years and she led me on a treacherous journey through bitchy, across frigid, and into the land of cheating psycho. I barely escaped with my life. It required a week of solid moping just so my balls could grow back.

I don't want a new man.""I'll be dead someday," my mother said. "And then what? You'll wish you had someone.""I have a hamster.

Sounds to me like you're talkin' about the wrong things. Why don't you talk about other things? Like you could make a list of things you won't fight over and then you only talk about those things.

So thirsty," Jack groaned."So worried,"said the frog. I hope we don't starve to death.""Yes,"said Jill, "not starving to death would be nice.""So would not thirsting to death," said Jack"Thirsting isn't even a word," said Jill"It isn't?""No.""Then what's the word?""I dont know. You just can't.""Oh."This is, of course, the kind of inane conversation that occurs when people are slowly losing their minds.

And what the fuck were you doing parading around in those jeans and that shirt last—”“Parading?”“You are not allowed to put on your fuck-me clothes if I ain’t there to do the fucking!

You go in, I go in.""Listen---"He took her face in his hands."You go, I go. That's non-negotiable. If we're to get blasted to hell or poisoned into lunatics, we do it together.""Crap, Crap. You have to look less rich and gorgeous."God help him, she made him grin. "I'll do what I can.