1,680 Quotes About Comedy

Some people seem quite destitute a sense of humour.

It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing.

What I find predictable is crazy people's ability to predict that unpredictable people can be predicted by their consistent unpredictable behavior, thus making all crazy people predictable when the world says they are unpredictable. Therefore, I must be “right” because I can predict crazy because I have been trained in the unpredictable nature of consistent craziness because I am crazy.

No one ever thinks about the guy who was raised by the guy who was raised by wolves.

What’s SQ?” asked Evan.“Sexual Quotient.”“What’s that?”“Basically, it’s your odds of getting laid. Everyone has an SQ. just like everyone has an IQ.”“I’ve never heard that term before.”“That’s because I made it up.”“That figures. Finally applying your actuarial skills to what really matters, eh?

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

Oh. Well was this your first time painting a live model?”She nodded her head, with an almost guilty look on her face.“What’s it like?”“Hard,” she replied.

But despite these and many other differences, Evan and Heeb had become close friends – an improbability that could have been produced only by the even greater improbabilities that brought them together.

In summers, after 1 hour of extreme gaming you can use your laptop to iron your shirt.