316 Quotes About Funny-and-random

People in hell want snowcones.

She said my glasses made me look like a butch jock's locker room bitch.

Well blow me down with a solar flare.

Ish #19 "If your diet soda has zero calories, zero sugar and zero fat, what the hell are you drinking?

They’re macarons, not macaroons, you imbecile! One ‘o’, not two.

And so the cycle of innocence found, lost, found again, and finallylost is complete. Just as a peanut is neither a pea nor a nut… and a thighmaster is neither a thigh nor a master… so our hero learned thatNetflix and Chill means neither Netflix nor Chill.And if you’re just learning this for the first time, welcome to the end of your innocence.

Anything can be art, it just might be bad art.

I'd have kicked your ass as too your head were both not full of shit, butthead.

My ass is taking part in the next Ass Of The Year Championships next week, at Asscot.