5,226 Quotes About Humour

The death of a billionaire is worth more to the media than the lives of a billion poor people.

Well... Emmett is real, and I’ve just broken up with Cadence.

Every single person is a fool, insane, a failure, or a bad person to at least ten people.

I'm not saying he was, like, crying tears of man pain over the phone, but he sounded upset.

I'm a whore!"Miki hit the brakes...her hands.. gripping the steering wheel, glanced at Sara. "You're not wearing any underwear, are you?"Sara let out a strangled squeal...

Being rich or famous is the only profound thing that some people have ever said.

Nick wanted to meet on campus at Love Library. (That was the actual name; thank you for your donation, Mayor Don Lathrop Love.)

because daytime leaves vampires less than, well, conscious, I told him, “Take your muffins to Boston and shut it, Terrance.” And then I hung up on him.

It is still cheating, even if nobody comes.